Prayer in the Workplace

Hi Alyse,

I work in a call center where we have morning motivational meetings. The problem is during these meetings my supervisor insists on "saying a prayer". He says things like God will bless us today, May God look favorably on us, etc. He is a devout something or another and I don't have a problem with what he believes but I am an atheist and I kind of resent having to pray in the morning. It's bad enough I can't really tell people I'm an atheist because then I would either be ignored or they would constantly try to convert me (this has happened before). Are there any rules about prayer in the workplace? Should I approach my supervisor? How? HELP!

Frustrated Atheist in Springfield, VA

Hey Frustrated,

This is a complicated topic that is written about extensively - for a sense of the rules involved, see the information below and the link to the webpage discussing the legality of prayer in the workplace. It seems to me that his religious views are being forced upon you and your hesitation seems to point to your belief that you will be harassed because of YOUR beliefs. Contact your HR immediately IN WRITING. Document at least three incidents IN GREAT DETAIL that involve this mandatory morning prayer and request a response regarding whether this is appropriate. In your letter you should frame the question to be whether or not this is proper rather than you feel like your rights are being violated. All you are asking for is mutual respect and you should get it.

A. Fox

Every human being, of whatever origin, of whatever station, deserves respect. We must each respect others even as we respect ourselves. (U. Thant)




http://www.professionalroofing.net/article.aspx?A_ID=854

The extent to which you can or must accommodate prayer in the workplace depends on the nature of the prayer. There are two basic types of prayer: optional prayer said at the discretion of a religion's members and mandatory prayer required by a particular religion.

Optional prayer is permissible in the workplace as long as it is not mandatory; participation (or lack of participation) is not a factor in any employment decision and is not limited to a particular religion.

You can organize voluntary prayer meetings, but to avoid coercion (real or perceived), hold such meetings before or after the workday or during recognized break times. This will minimize pressure on employees who do not wish to join in or who do not share the same beliefs. In addition, clearly state participation in such prayer is optional and declining to participate will not result in adverse treatment or otherwise affect employment. This is particularly important if the prayer occurs during a training session, workplace meeting or other mandatory work activity.

You also must recognize not all employees hold the same beliefs. If employees who hold different beliefs want to have prayer sessions of their own, they must be given an equal opportunity to do so with the same access to prayer sites, same time away from work (paid or unpaid) to pray, and same breaks or other accommodations.

Mandatory prayer is not a matter of choice but a requirement of a particular religion. Muslims, for example, must pray five times per day at specified times in accordance with the sun's cycle and engage in specified washing rituals before each prayer. You are required to provide scheduling considerations to such employees and accommodate the break times necessary to perform these prayers as long as such accommodation does not pose an undue hardship or undue disruption to company operations.

The Chickens Have Come Home to Roost

Hey Alyse!

I'm am the managing Legal Assistant for a pretty large law firm that is in the process of a major expansion. One of my responsibilities is to hire Legal Assistants for the various departments and of course manage those assistants. Well the other day, a resume came across my desk and once I looked at the name, I realized that I knew the girl. Years ago, when I was just starting out (fresh out of school) I started working at a law firm where she was already working. The relationship did not start off well and she would do petty things to undermine the Associate Lawyer's relationship with me. One day, I asked her to help me out with a procedure I didn't know about and she told me "Honey, right now you're climbing the ladder, and I'm above you, when I see someone below me, I'm not going to put my hand out to help - I'm going to kick my foot out - figure it out yourself". I was shocked, no one has ever said that to me before or since. Now she wants a job, at my firm, working under me - the thing is she is very experienced with great credentials - what do I do?


Climbing the ladder in New York, NY


Hey Climbing,

Leave that resume right where you found it. Do you want someone on your team who obviously does not understand what it means to be a team player? Maybe she has changed but the fact is that past behavior is the best indicator of future behavior. The fact that she will not be employed by your firm is not your fault - the chickens have come home to roost.


A. Fox
If one speaks or acts with a cruel mind, misery follows, as the cart follows the horse... If one speaks or acts with a pure mind, happiness follows, as a shadow follows its source.
the Dhammapada

Need an MBA?

Hey Alyse,

I have a job interview coming up and I don’t know if I should go. I’ve worked at a few places the last couple of years and I’ve left because the employer made promises that they didn’t keep. One job told me that I would be able to move up really quickly, after six months I was in the same position so I quit. Another job told me that I would make $40,000 a year but after I started working I found out that that included bonuses! I’m tired of people saying one thing to you during the interview but doing something completely different when you start the job, the next job I go to is going to have to really convince me that they are the right fit for me. The recruiter that set up the interview for me isn’t really doing a good job convincing me – should I go?

Job Hunting West Chester, PA

Hey Job Hunting,

Slow down warrior! You have it all wrong – NO employer has to convince you to work for them, they are issuing the paycheck! First, your brief description tells me that you enter into the job relationship with unrealistic expectations and when those expectations aren’t met – you just quit. If you have had 3 jobs in the last few years that makes you a job hopper at best or just a plain old quitter. I don’t think I’m going out on a limb by assuming that you don’t have good job references. Whether you go to the interview or not is entirely up to you, however, what I do suggest you do before going to the interview is to bury your old attitude and get an MBA – Much Better Attitude.

A. Fox

Human beings, by changing the inner attitudes of their minds, can change the outer aspects of their lives. (William James)

Terry Tate - Office Linebacker?

Hi Alyse!

I work for a retail company inside of a mall. We work at a kiosk with four stations and we each have our own
money bag. At the end of the day, we put the bags in the safe and lock the safe. We all have the code to the safe.
All four of us who work the stations have been there for over a year and we've never missed a dollar.
We have a new customer service rep who transferred in three weeks ago from another store and everyday, there seems to
be a small amount of money missing from at least one money bag on the day she opens the store. We had
a temp last week and he was missing money the one day he worked - she trained him that day. We each
have had to replace the money ourselves because the bags are supposed to be our responsibility. I haven't seen
her take the money so I can't accuse her but she always seems to be the one with the time and the access.
I don't know her motive but I know she's always complaining about not having any money. Even though she complains about money,
she goes to the local bar every night and the local club every weekend! I've considered putting a spider in my bag so it would
bite the thief when she puts her sticky hands in there but she'd probably turn around and sue me...(Sigh) I need help.

Trying to catch a thief Wilkes Barre, PA


Hey W-B!

What you need is Terry Tate, the office linebacker! LOL!

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=WXzssFPV2WY&feature=related
Everytime she stands near the cash register or touches your bag (boom) - he's right there.


Seriously, someone has to lay down the law - first, report the fact that you are missing money, just one time
(if you seem to be consistently losing money, I know some company's will start looking at you).
Second, if you trust the other people in the booth each of you should take the time to be
the designated Office Linebacker, when she goes near someone's till or goes into the safe, one of you should be right there.
The days that you know she is supposed to open, whoever is scheduled to come in after her should come in early - BEFORE she opens the safe.
Maybe you should suggest to your company that all of you get new money bags with individual keys that each of you would carry separately.
On an evening when you close, assuming she is not closing with you, ask your manager to come in and watch you count your bag before you
place it in the safe, the next day (assuming she is opening) ask your manager to arrive with you to count your bag again. Even if there is no
money missing, she'll either get the message or slip up and get arrested - either way your problem should not go on for long.


A. Fox
"The reasonable man adapts himself to the world; the unreasonable one persists in trying to adapt the world to himself. Therefore, all progress depends on the unreasonable man."
George Bernard Shaw

Where'd you park the Delorean?

Hi Alyse,

I just started a job at this new company and I don’t get paid for four weeks. It’s a step up from my last position and could be considered a promotion. My problem is that everyone wears pants suits everyday, the only pants suit I own is the one I wore to the interview. The nice clothes I have are my church clothes and I started wearing them to work but everyone was looking at me like “where’d you park your Delorean?” I don’t mean to vent but shouldn’t it be okay that I dress neatly – what’s the deal with the pressure?

Pressured in Peoria, IL

Hi Pressured!

Here’s the thing, it seems as though you weren’t really ready for the promotion – did you research the company before you started working to get a sense of the corporate culture? When you went to the interview did you take a look at how everyone was dressed? It seems like you were hit by a car that was coming straight for you! Of course, no use crying over spilled milk; ditch the church clothes and head over to your local Goodwill, Salvation Army or similar store. You should be able to find some suits there. If you don’t have one of those stores, go to any department store and head straight for the clearance isle. It might mean putting some things together but you don’t want the company feeling like you aren’t a good “fit”. You’re going to have to spend some money to keep this job. The old saying the first impression is the lasting impression is true – you don’t want to forever be the Delorean lady.

A. Fox

The way to gain a good reputation is to endeavor to be what you desire to appear. Socrates

Sick Days

Hi Alyse,

I'm pretty new to my job, I've only been there 4 months and have full benefits including health insurance and sick days. People at my job do not use their sick days - they tell war stories about how they have come into work after falling down stairs the night before, with 100 degree fevers, the list goes on and on. Well the flu is going around and the war hero's in my office of course came to work and of course I got sick - too sick to go to work. I had body shakes, high fever and was incoherent for a couple of days. I stayed home for a couple of days and when I got back to work, it seemed like I was getting the cold shoulder from my colleagues like I broke some kind of code. What's the point of sick days if you don't use them when you're sick? HELP!

Sick and Tired in West Palm Beach, FL

Hey S&T,

Whatever your company culture, you, being the new kid on the block can not change it nor should you try. What you can do however, is take care of yourself, it doesn't seem like you would have been very productive if you had gone into work with "body shakes". Of course with your weakened immune system, you might have been exposed to the other illnesses your colleagues seem comfortable bringing into the workplace, making you worse. You want your company to pay your health benefits, not your death benefits. Take your days and take care of yourself. Assuming lost productivity is the issue with your co-workers, when you get back go to work early and let your co-workers know that you want to make up for the time you were out of the office. Spend a couple of days eating lunch at your desk stay later than everyone else, making sure that they know you are trying to make up for lost time. If that doesn't work then perhaps your co-workers are just miserable people who want your company when you're miserable.

A. Fox
"There are two ways of exerting one's strength: one is pushing down, the other is pulling up."
Booker T. Washington

Sleeping with the Enemy

Hi Alyse!

I've been a server/manager for the last 6 years at the same restaurant - partly to have restaurant experience and partly to help pay for some of my bills while I was going to school full time. The restaurant has an excellent reputation in town I graduated with a degree in Hotel and Restaurant Management 4 months ago and am having a hard time getting a job. I'm only looking at management positions and at higher end restaurants because I have experience in that field (that's the kind of restaurant I worked in for 6 years), I've got $60000 worth of school loans to pay back and I support myself. I've been going on interviews but not getting any callbacks or offers and I'm starting to think it's because of my references. In my fourth year of employment, I started dating my boss, the General Manager who is also the owner's son. I left a month after I graduated from school because we went through an bad break up.
HELP!

Sleeping with the enemy Baltimore, MD

Hi B-More!

I get this one a lot and I've developed a patented 5 step response action plan designed to help you stay out of this particular quandry. Here goes:

1. Don't sleep with your boss;
2. Don't sleep with your boss;
3. Don't sleep with your boss;
4. Don't sleep with your boss;
5. Don't sleep with your boss.

Now, after you've completed the 5 step program, you may want to look into securing 1-2 valuable internships (where they are unlikely to ask for references but are likely to provide good references) and starting over. If you list your experience at the restaurant as just a server and place any focus on your management skills on the internships, you should be able to explain why your references are from the internships. In addition, once you explain it's a family business that did not give you the opportunity to move up, it becomes clear why you are no longer with the company. I get your school loan money situation, you may want to request an unemployment forbearance while you work on gainful employment.

A. Fox
...You live and learn. At any rate, you live. (Douglas Adams)

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